I realized this a few days ago, but never really got the express it. My love and best friend, Peter, has always been very religiously confused and never really found something that was good for him. Having a pagan girlfriend, I guess he felt more able to explore those sides of the religion, as his family is very Christian, as well as most of our friends and he felt as if he would have no one to ask about it. I've been very open with my religion, and had always thought he would just stay there with his own oddly shaped values. He had always displayed some pagan values, such as the ever present "shrine" to his father, who made the journey to the summerland a few years ago. It was remarkably like an altar, incense, swords, etc. but I never thought much of it.

We've been together for almost a year now [it will be a year on the 29th] and the last month or two, he's been seeing different paths and talking to me about it, and he's found Shamanism. He's found it. Something has just clicked. After taking his first journey, he was entralled, and told me it just felt perfect. He's so excited, and I feel so blessed to be the person he knows he can share his experiences with, or ask any questions. He's been journeying for a while now, and is quickly moving from being a seeker to being on his path. I feel so happy to know that he can ask me things, and talk to me about his path. Knowing that he has someone there. When I started, I was completely solitary, hadn't had the internet at home, and didn't even have something like this, I'm so glad he has a contact. it makes the transition so much easier. His spirit guide even told him to ask me for help last week!

I don't know if any of you have ever observed the process of someone finding their path, whatever it may be, but I believe it is one of the most beautiful things one will ever come across.  What about you guys?

So, these next few weeks are going to be busy, and definitely stressful.

The Stress:

Next Wednesday is my Driver's Test to get my license. As if I don't already have enough stress about it [I'm commuting to school and if I don't get my license, I don't go to college this year. I'm already signed up and have loans out for it now, plus I can't keep my job, which I need to go to school and pay for the car I have that I won't be able to drive if I don't get it] My driving instructor for my 8 hour course took me aside and told me to be really careful because the bridgeport DMV has a 85% fail rate on their driver's tests.  >.<  As if I'm not already worried enough. I'm a good driver, I think I'll pass, but there's so much riding on it, I'm really frigging nervous.

The 26th of this month, I'm going to a baby shower with a part of my family that I haven't seen in years. They don't know much about my life, and they're all heavily Christian. A family member who is quite the gossip saw me at the grocery store wearing my pentagram pendant, and is sure to tell the others. Shit should hit the fan. Annndd I'm not going to stop it. I'm wearing my pentagram to the shower too. I'm proud, and they need to accept that, but still... it's going to be a good time.

I start my freshmen year of college on the 4th of September, and I'm really nervous. Not just about school but about all my friends leaving as well, and not having the support group I used to have. My boyfriend's going to school with me, which is great, but I'm also nervous about that, because he's really different when he's at school [he hates talking about anything other than general conversation at school, and he happens to have several people who look up to him and are always around him. But hey, thats what I get for getting the charismatic leader type for a love] and I'm worried that I'll crowd him or something. We have only seen each other like twice, maybe 3 times a week our entire relationship, and suddenly, it's going to be almost every day. I shouldn't worry, I know that, he's been more than amazing and when I talked to him about it, he comforted me, and told me he couldn't wait to see me everyday and that he'd be more than happy to find alone time with me and he'll try to change that a little but I'm still worried.

But! In good news!:

-My baby Gecko is doing awesome. He's very friendly, healthy, and active. Loves to hang out under the log cave that my Daddy made him, and loves to crawl all over his Mommy and Daddy [me and my boyfriend] So i'm happy about that.

-If I pass my driver's test, I'll be able to spend some more time with Peter, and actually have alone time with him, which we don't get often because he doesn't have a car and our friends are our only transportation, and we're always in a group. We've been dating almost a year now, and we've been alone 3 or 4 times throughout. So that's exciting.

-My one year anniversary with my love is the 29th! yay!!

Well, that's it for today. About to go out I guess

Love you all

<3 

So, now that I'm here and have seen that people respond to the blogs, I would like to ask a question. I've been wondering this for a while, and since I'm solitary [I can't wait for my car and coven finding] I haven't had anyone to ask so far. So, here's the break down:

Ever since I was young, I have visualized many things in colors, mostly voices from people. When people speak to me, and I stop concentrating on their faces/other distractions, colors, usually a mix of colors, comes through my mind as they speak, ebbing and flowing with elevations and such in their voices. It works best when I close my eyes, but as it's rude to do so when someone's speaking to you, I avoid it. However, over the phone, it just happens automatically. They seem to change with the moods of people, and the colors all have different hues and mixtures.

For example, when I talk to my boyfriend on the phone, he's a lot of different colors, but mainly a mix of deep greens, browns, and intense blues, sometimes a softer blue, and white. All the colors come and go, and are not always together, and sometimes they change, such as once, his voice was an OBNOXIOUS orange color after he had a horrible day. But when I talk to my mother [long story short, I was taken away from her at the age of 14 because of emotional and physical neglect, as well as abuse and substance abuse. We don't get along, but she calls sometimes] I get an awkward mix of Deep blacks, Greys, and an ugly dark yellow color for the most part.

I don't quite know what it is, someone suggested auras, but I don't see it around someone's body or anything, it's almost like... if you've ever seen an old stereo, they have that screen with the bars that move around with the music, except it's one smooth, cornerless stream. Like a river almost.

Any suggestions?

I'm Ashley. I'm seventeen, soon to be eighteen, An eclectic Celtic Wiccan. I'm a Geek. Not in the cute way, but in the, Freshmen in college, play World of Warcraft, and go out with my friends only to sit around and play Vampires:The Masquerade way. I enjoy singing beyond anything, but am nothing more than average in voice talent, but hey, I'll sing anyways, out of tune or not. I'm a bit compulsive, highly moody, really outgoing, and sometimes obnoxious, and honestly a little bit insane, but you'll get used to it. Well... maybe

I'm in love, I've been in love for almost 4 years now, and only on the date of August 29, 2006 did my love become recognized, and fullfilled. It's something that happens when you're head over heels, irreversibly devoted, and going mad in the head over your best friend. You think it's never going to happen, but you wish anyways, and then one day, when you've almost given up all hope, you're watching a cartoon comedy on his aunt's couch, and he is suddenly gracing your lips with his, and your whole body is on fire. After the shock wears off, you start floating, and I still haven't come down.

For anyone who wants to talk, my sn= iateeight